Monday, September 14, 2009

Engagements

As in marriage engagements. ;-)


My best girl friend AbbyD is officially engaged to her darling Kenny! I am so excited for her! I don't think I have ever been this excited about someone getting married. I know that Kenny and Abby are following God and going about things the "right" way. In quotes because everyone has to seek after God for themselves, but there are also some principles of purity applicable to every couple. I trust that my dear friends have been and will continue to abide by these principles.

Abby and Kenny have been together... actually I am not exactly sure how long they have been together. Anyway, I finally got to meet Kenny this summer. He is wonderful! I will be very happy to see him become my best girl friend's husband, and she his wife.  I know that indeed I will not be losing her as a friend. Only gaining a dear brother in Christ. The two of them are adorable together. Watching them interact is like watching a beautifully choreographed dance. I know that they will do well together.

The news of Abby's engagement truly makes me feel that we are growing older. Abby and I first started growing closer several years ago when her Dad was diagnosed with brain cancer. Although our families have been friends since like forever, my first true memory of bonding with Abby was riding in the back of a van in winter to go see her Dad in the hospital. I would have never guessed then that she would become so dear to me and only a few years later be engaged to be married! Abby is indeed an exceptional friend. I don't think we have ever been angry with each other. Only supportive. We can go months without talking and then pick up the phone and talk non-stop for hours. Oh! I could go on and on about Abby's many merits. For now, suffice it to say that I am very glad that God placed her in my life!

Now, this post isn't just going to be about Abby. Last week I noticed another young lady in my community was engaged. I was a little surprised as she is somewhat young and I wouldn't have guessed her to be the marrying young sort. Despite my surprise I was happy for her and gave her my congratulations. A few days later as I was talking with my mother on the phone she asked me if I had heard about the young lady. Without suspecting anything else I replied, "Yes, she is engaged." Then I found out why she is engaged, she is pregnant. Rather than bringing joy, these sort of engagements and marriages are disheartening. I don't know. I don't have much more of a commentary for now. Only that I am sad to see this going on.

Moving on, I would like to write a little note about my engagement. Or more accurately, my lack of engagement. You see, I know that Dan and I are to get married someday.  Yet, we are not engaged. Earlier this year I was really struggling with the definition of the relationship. Either we should be engaged to be married or not be in a relationship at all. It was a very black and white issue to me. I struggled with feeling that he wasn't truly committed to me if he didn't want to be engaged. I wondered if I should pull out of the relationship until he was ready take on that commitment. Countless different emotions and thoughts were swirling around in my head. Then one day I heard God speak to me. He told me that I needed to give it up to Him and stay in the relationship without being engaged. I realized that it was actually God whom I was failing to trust, not Dan. It was totally unfair to Dan to make him carry my lack of trust in God! It took an act of faith from me, but I gave my struggle over to God. I now feel freedom and peace to be in a relationship with Dan and I am trusting God for His timing regarding the engagement.

3 comments:

  1. I remember waiting for an engagement too. It is so worth it in the end to have waited and not pushed my feelings onto my man. To have him be the one to bring it upon me instead of him feel like he was being trapped. The time will come, and even though it may be later that you had expected, it will be much, much better!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha, I love you!! I am happy, happy, HAPPY! YAY! I will try to call you today. Or... definitely email you. ;-)

    ReplyDelete